I'm missing how things used to be, past memories and the people in it. I miss those people. The care-freeness of childhood, when you only worry about things like what to have for the next meal. Time in school was spend laughing and running around with friends and homework was something manageable and at times fun. Now, I feel stagnant. I feel like people are growing and moving on, doing exciting things in their lives, but here I am, stuck in a rut of gloom and worry. Its Chinese New Year and everyone's having so much fun, but my mind just keep going back into the gloom. This year is so so tough and it's only the beginning. School is demanding so much more and pushing us to our limits. Sometimes I wonder if I can survive through this, and regain some of that care-freeness that was left forgotten in my childhood.
I want to go back to the past, but at the same time I am desperate to be done with 2012. Best friend, where on earth are you? I need someone to tell me everything will be alright, that I'm capable to accomplish all that I dream of, and make me believe it, not question it. Ugh I'm depressing.
Labels: Musings, School
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